Friday, September 26, 2014

It Sucks!

Have you ever had that moment in a week where everything is a little bit disappointing and a little bit noisy that you just prefer to escape elsewhere and cool down?

There are really moments where I felt my self-esteem is slowly disintegrating no matter how I assured myself that everything is normal in the environment. At times, I hate all those cretins because of the treatment where I should suppose to function like an on-call heavy utility service, where every bloody request must be accommodated without balking. Oh God, it sucks!
It made me to contemplate harder what I am really up to. Why I am here? Is everything rotating according to my goals? Would I continue to allow all those jerks to just stomp me and treat me like a machine? Or it’s time to reassess my life’s purpose and reconsider other options?

I’ve come a long way in my journey. I’ve been working for the past 10 years, started at the basement, made a little way up, learned lots of things along the way, got my professional career service eligibility, did freelance writing job, became a professional blogger, obtained a master’s degree, published books, and all those emotional maturity stuff everyone could think about growing gracefully.
But oh goodness why it seems I went back to the basic? Why I am relegated to an entry-level-sort of thing? The final humiliation came when I mounded with tasks that are seemed far way below the line. Do I project an image where I deserved only at carrying bags from the grocery and carting drinks? No, I am not bitter I am only wondering why there seems to be an unclear definition of delineating functions.
True enough, none is perfect, every environment has plus and minus, every organization has flaws and strengths and your decision to stay on the boat and continue the journey depends on how you have map your path and define your goals in life. At the end of the day it’s still your personal life that at stake and not theirs. What matters is your own views of quality life and fulfillment, it cannot be trade-in; it comes from deep within and can only be felt if everything is moving towards the same direction. 

Anyway, I am very clear with my life's plans and directions. A year ago, I should suppose to work full time online as SEO writer but had to turn it down because I want to experience what it feels like working in the real world, in a global company, but had no plan to make it a lifetime career. Soon, I would really find my niche in this world and concentrate in my passion.

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