Saturday, June 28, 2014

Dear Soulmate...




“I was made and meant to look for you and wait for you and become yours forever.” 
- Robert Browning

Have you ever tried writing an open letter to yourself or to anybody else including the people you have never meet? 

Call it madness, but according to Writer's Digest International, scribbling an open letter is one of the most effective tools in removing clutters from day-to-day life, partly sweeping off stress, pressure and boredom. This is relieving as it allows everyone to undergo a certain process of releasing unspoken longings, anger, frustrations and worries. 

So here I am, doing this thing for the first time, hoping to find some peace of mind ^___^

You might think I am a bit desperate and becoming delusional but while blog walking, I read this heart-warming open letter about, well, of all topics, waiting for the right one. 

Darn! Here we go again!

Oh, sounds crazy but according to the blogger, this ritual will help pacify one's confused mind of excruciatingly waiting for that futuristic "the one".

Okay, so let's begin this craziness :-P

Hello soulmate, are you still alive? Or just trap elsewhere in the North Pole or Timbuktu. Wherever you are, may the soft breeze of the winds carry this letter to your hiding place and urge you to speed up your journey ^_____^

Dear "True Love slash Soulmate",

English dramatist, William Shakespeare, once said "Your journey will end when you meet your true love". Wow! What a cliche! But for more than 10 years, I am continue walking with this never-ending journey, wondering where it leads me.

Ever since the day I started reading about fairytale stuff, I was also wondering if  Prince charming is real, if there's really a sort of man like a Knight-in-a-shining armour that exists. I remember thinking the day how I would meet you and fall madly in love and eventually sail into the sunset of our lives together.  

But as years rolled into a decade, my yearning to meet and find you remains a long hell of a mystery. My steps eventually dragged me to a-never-ending dilapidated road of frustrations and trepidations that made the route of my journey extremely long and tedious. How long would I continue walking before our destiny collides?

You know, this sounds absurd and a bit funny, but did you know that I'm totally loyal? Oh, whatever that means :-P Because for the past decades, I've never ever ventured into messy relationships, not even a date, afraid I would miss my chance of meeting you.


For so long, since I became aware how my heartbeat would skip in excitement, you know that butterfly-thudding-stuff inside the abdomen, every time I see happy couples tucking each other's arms while walking in the street, I never stop longing for you. 


In college until I got a job, I met guys of different kinds but none of them caught my fancy. I withheld emotions and decided to just wait, hoping cherubs from heaven will conspire to guide your way to the road where I am travelling. 
Counting more years. Moment by moment, until "waiting" became part of my routine, but still no clear hint that you're coming so soon. 

I've exhausted all my effort to look for signs where in the heck of the universe you are hiding but to no avail. I've made novenas, called saints, made wishes through shooting stars, in falling eyelashes, in every feast day, I even tried throwing coins in a wishing well even though I looked like a complete stupid watching the coins reached the bottom of the well wondering what phenomenon would happen next. I even uttered wishes when 11:11 in the morning strikes, but you're no where to be found. 

Then people said, a soulmate should never be looked for, he will just come in due time when everything is in the right place at the right time. I wonder where's that right place. Of course I will not complain, for God's time is always perfect. So, here I am, patiently absorbing the intricate meaning of "waiting".

But lately, it seems my patience of waiting starts to disintegrate and I could feel my weariness slowly invading my once energetic disposition. I started questioning myself if am too dreamy or just simply stubborn. Do I need to wait until eternity? 

The scenario of my life feels like a restaurant, with choices of special meals and daily menu. Should I wait for my special order to be delivered? Or just settle for the daily menu. 


But of course I won't settle for the daily menu because you're special. I won't lose hope, for I know you are just out there, somewhere, miles away, from a distance, just waiting for God to give you a signal. I know when time calls it perfect, everything will just run smoothly and our path will finally cross. But until then, only God can decide. Our only enemy is time. But no matter how time and space separate us, I know circumstances will make ways.

True love is always worth the wait, so they say, even if there are times that I want to give up, this promise of waiting keeps my energy high and invigorating. Someday everything will really make sense and understand why I have to wait a little longer. It's still a long way ahead but I am willing to hold on. 

Each morning when I am taking my breakfast, I would throw my glances outside the window, up to the vivid horizon, watching the beautiful skyline in search of a meaning, the vibrant rays of the romantic sunshine seem reassuring, telling me that life is some sort of a tricky puzzle game, others unlock the mystery of it earlier, the rest needs more patience and time to solve the puzzle, but the more I wait, the more I am confident that God's gift is very special and carefully chosen among the finest and gentlest men.

Everyday a strand of hope reappears in my horizon, trying to bind the cord of confidence that seems loosen up with distress. The road of waiting is endless and rough but I just keep reminding myself that God's time is always perfect and He designs a grand plan for everyone to enjoy the beauty of life. I've never been so sure of anything. But this time I could feel the moment of our destiny to clash is just a heartbeat away.

Waiting you from a distance....

Okay, done! ^__^

Writing an open letter is like walking to my sacred journaling space, comfortable, relieving, fun. But the feeling of being relieved is just temporary, give it three days and it's back to normal of brooding again.Haaay!

Friday, June 27, 2014

True Love Waits,,,

...So never settle for anything less. 

Wait for that beautiful feeling where every moment seems magical. A Kind of magic that only heart understands. And no matter how long it takes, true love is always worth the wait.

But the question is, just how long this waiting period will finally come to an end? Do I need to wait for a supernova to explode in the galaxy to meet that elusive "someone"? 

Will the planets in the solar system collide first before this thing called love come to my doorstep? How many more heartaches, wrong assumptions, frustrations, despair, hopelessness I should endure before that encounter will happen?

Well, only God knows. And I have no right to ask God why and when for His time is always perfect and beautiful.

While most folks found their true love at the early part of their lives, others seem took eternity to stumble on the "one". It's the mystery of life. And to uncover it with just a stroke of a human brain is a sure suicide. So just leave it as it is and just wait for the season to come and go haha! 

We might have a clear idea what we want in life and who we want to be with, but sometimes our plans do not go as how we want it to be due to uncontrollable factors that often pop up along the way. 

Until waiting becomes the hardest word to understand. It entails a web of emotions: longing, frustration, hope, great anticipation, excitement, distress and anxiety, nevertheless love always worth the wait. The best recourse is to make a compromise with time and keep going.




Sunday, June 22, 2014

Emotional Vampires

Beware of these vultures. They are mentally exhausting and will deplete your physical energy.

Though it is often difficult to determine who is an emotional vampire or who is just having a bad day, the clear parameter of this type can be easily detected.

Emotional vampires refer to people who drain your strength, confidence and mental state while individuals who are just having a bad day are, well, simply annoying.

Emotional vampires suck every ounce of your energy and optimism in life and they are severely distressing you might even wish you never meet them at all. 

They are everywhere. What made the whole thing extremely agonizing is that these emotional vampires often do power tripping, assuming roles straight to their heads that they are superior, they will give orders rather than instruction and will tend to squeeze your physical strength, tearing the last strand of your patience. They are ruthless and hostile.

Why they seem to take roles too seriously even to the point of making one's life intolerable? It is because they have big issues on self esteem. Emotional vampires are severely insecure people, confused and they don't really know who they are so they stay behind dark alleys in life by portraying a role of being superior to boost their sinking ego.

They are people who have unresolved issues in the past. Who seemed could not let go with the suffering they experienced so they constantly think about revenge about letting others they are powerful and superior, they crave for power and adulation. Emotional vampires are not forgiving people, they often think the world is unfair, so they do the same thing to the people in their circle. They never see goodness in the environment.

So how to detect emotional vampires in your circle? According to Dr. Judith Orloff, author of Emotional Freedom, these energy suckers can be easily detected through these types:

The Narcissists

A narcissist is a kind of person who assumes the grandiose of self-importance, "me first" is their motto and they always wanted everybody to prioritize them. They crave for power, admiration and attention. They tend to give you orders and not instruction as if they own you and if you don't do things according to their will, they become punishing and cold. These vampires will grate  your patience up to the last drop with their too assuming superior self. They are hungry for attention and admiration.

The Controllers

These emotional vampires are obsessively controlling, manipulative and will tend to dictate you how you should suppose to work, to live, to act, to move. They will invalidate your feelings if you won't fit to their life rules. They are intensely dominating, rude and narrow-minded.

The Drama Queens

They have a flair of exaggerating even the smallest details of life. They demand your time when they have problems which seem they have all the time. When things get tough, they seem to feel so easily down and will make everything to redirect your attention to them. They seem to complicate even a very simple thing. They feel the world is treating them unfair. They demand your time and brood on things so easily as if circumstances regularly showered them with problems and concerns in life. They are haters who never easily forgive and who never appreciate optimism.


There you go...the emotional vampires who often make our lives intensely punishing.

Have you meet one of them? In my life, yes, I often encountered these emotionally draining people. But because I have no issue with my self esteem and I am already emotionally secure I often made ways to let the rudeness pass and make the best of the situation by focusing on wonderful and positive aspects in life. I also try to avoid them at all cost.

Saturday, June 21, 2014

It's Game Over!!

I read this, uhmm, somewhat intriguing article from FORTUNE magazine "Your Boss Just Doesn't Like You" in which TIME magazine commented "Just don't leave your job yet, Here's what to do if your boss kinda hates you" blah, blah, blah.

I was perturbed with the pointers/advises presented, not that I am stubborn and myopic in thinking but because the main thought just doesn't make sense. Having a rude and arrogant boss who treated you like a dusted shelf in the workplace is unbearably distressing. Remember, happiness is a choice, fulfillment is a decision. If you just stay in the job just because of fear you might nothing to eat the next morning then you're in a deep trouble. No one dies in starvation right away, stress yes.


If you’re tied w/a certain bond, okay, that applies, but if not, and everyone is treating you like a doormat as if you're a service dog ready to take anything they commanded and they expect you must say nothing,  oh my God why the bloody pretense? 

It’s game over and it’s TIME for the next adventure, after all life is an interesting journey and there are plenty of wonderful things on the other side of the road. Discovery cannot be found in the comfort zone. Dare to take risks, discover your passion and work hard on it.  Those who won't, actually never live life at all.

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Splitting Moment


In a splitting moment, life transforms. A thrill of wonder dances, bubbles of emotions burst in the air and suddenly you found yourself bathing with so much inspiration and you may just want to forget the reality. But truth persists and pain is pesky. Eventually, magic dies. 

There's nothing more agonizing in this world than watching yourself undergo a silent pain of wanting something you could never have, the hurt is pricking on skin like needle and you just want to hide it w/laughter and thoroughly accept the fact that something precious is no longer possible.

Oh, I am here again traversing the road of illusion, pretending time and circumstances would conspire to make things happen. But deep inside I am aware it could never be realized for everything is too late to draw the fate together. 

It's almost 1:00 in the morning and I have a hard time drowsing to sleep. What is it again? Am I deeply bothered? Or thinking something hazy? My mind seems in a limbo, obscure pictures of undefined future continue to haunt my day. 

Oh that elusive perfect moment, you know that strange and rare feelings where you could see beautiful rainbows every minute of the day and you could feel the thudding of your heartbeat faster than the swinging of pendulum, it comes only but once, but why when it comes things are no longer possible? 

Sometimes I would just want to ignore the rules of life. You know, when you are in a certain stage where every second counts as you could no longer afford to undergo so many delays, logic seems a funny thing. You just want to follow emotions no matter where it leads you because you believe you might not experience that perfect moment again. But society is harsh and people are judgemental. Everyone expects you to adhere to the rules of life where mistake is not tolerated.

It's 1:30 AM and the calm atmosphere of the early dawn soothes my mind, allowing my energy to slow down and touch my spirit and reminisce my day. It's not that bad I know. In fact, it's really a sweet, inspiring and wonderful day. 

Turn of events gave me so much opportunity to think what I should really want in life. It's good to see things at once. As if I was given options and should choose one before the end of the day. Then voices in my mind growled and stubbornly insisted to pick the complicated choice. 

Oh! The vagueness of life. 

Saturday, June 14, 2014

Happy Father's Day!!



"It's only when you grow up, and step back from him, or leave him for your own career and your own home, it's only then that you can measure his greatness and fully appreciate it"   - Margaret Truman

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TO MY DEAR FATHER: LEONARDO C. LAMELA SR.!

As time rolled into a high technology era, the general notion of celebrating special occasions in a year like Valentine’s day, Mother’s day and Father’s day, has gradually become a hype of business establishments generating more profits on cards, flowers, foods, gift packages.

But despite this inimical impression of the modern world towards these celebrations, still we considered it as highly significant and almost sacred honoring our love ones with gratitude, love, and surprises. These celebrations allow us to recognize the remarkable role our love ones played in our existence.

Father's Day for instance.

The world will celebrate Father’s day tomorrow, June 15, and despite the hype of too much commercialization of this special occasion, still I believe it should be observed meaningfully, after all, it is a special day set aside in a year aims to pay tribute to our dear Papa.

Whether it is through bonding outdoor or sharing a warm conversation over food, spending this special day with our father would surely bring an extra mile of pleasure to their normal days. 

Generally, parents are easily touch even with a small gesture of attention and kindness from their children. Usually, they never ask for anything but when it is given wholeheartedly, a different surge of unmistakable delight engulf their system. 

Remembering beautiful childhood memories can be so poignant, it temporarily transports us back to our younger days when life was still uncomplicated, when the only things that matter in the world were food and toys and when we're bullied in school and father rushed to the scene to comfort us. Memories are great reminders that somewhere in our past, there's one great man who showed unconditional love and protection to us.

Though fathers in every part of the world come in different packages and personality, it all boils down to one thing --- the precious and sacrificing love they exemplify. They are always there when life becomes unfair and most of the time, they are our strong defenders.

Everyone has a unique story how the influence of their father molded their views in life and how this influence became a big part of the culture they developed within themselves. 

I've my own story too.

I’d known my father as a strict and very traditional disciplinarian while growing up. He had so many house rules and every mistake had a corresponding corporal punishment. He made sure we got the message by intensifying every rule with his booming voice. One way or another, his personality terrified me that I remember being very cautious even in washing plates afraid a slight error might offend him.

I thoroughly developed a certain form of principle, mindset as others may call it, to be cautious all the time, this became my mantra in later years and has been my guide not to rush anything in life to avoid committing a terrible mistake that might offend my father. During those years I truly believed that the main responsibility of each child is to obey and please their parents religiously.

But despite my father's stern disciplinary measures, I did not feel constricted with his rules. I did not grow up harboring bad feelings against my father. In fact I felt the opposite, I grew up admiring my father, I had an enormous respect towards him and very proud of him. What made his discipline very effective was the fact that he always had a corresponding explanation why we should follow the rules and why we were punished. Clear and detailed explanation.

Not once I ever thought of revolting against my father's wishes and except for education (he wanted me to take up Journalism in college and Law afterwards), I did not defy his other rules: never take boyfriends while still in school, never go with people who have unconventional lifestyle, no to night life and never entertain the idea of working abroad (his face would turn red every time he would hear us talking about going abroad).

They say, if an eldest child is a daughter, this little girl often leaves a special mark in her father's heart. A close bond develops, not because she is his first born child but because a father's instinct tells him that no harm must dwell in this girl's life, it's a genuine manly protection and we, ladies, experience it first hand from our fathers.

My father had lavished me with so much attention when I was growing up and had been my greatest supporter. When naughtiness of my playmates reduced me to tears, I was excited to rush home knowing I have a father who would wrap me in his arms and provide comfort. And life would be bright again. While my mother was so impatient with my stubbornness my father was not. 

But despite my father's maximum tolerance on me, I did not grow up a spoiled brat instead his protection had helped me realized that children should never disappoint their father at all cost. Oh I missed those times when my father would ask me what I wanted and how the meal would be cooked! Those were the best years of my life.

My father's affection was so great that I grew up thinking how I could make him more proud of me. How to make him happier with my chosen path. Every time I make a decision, I always think about my father and always put into consideration his pride and emotion.

Though fathers have different views how their children should be disciplined and how their house rules should be implemented, only one thing summarizes their intention, to raise their children sensibly and lovingly. As for my father, there's one thing I learned from him that made him an effective disciplinarian: the way he communicated his rules. Clear. Precise. Straight to the point. 

When a kid developed a certain form of culture during the formative years, it's impossible to remove this culture out of that child's personality. And it proved really true in my life. I am not easily swayed with the influence of the harsh environment and the people I interact everyday. It's always the discipline I learned from my father and the environment I grew up with that dominated my life.

For all the best years of my life and for being a good father, I thank you Papa for molding me into who I am today. Thank you for the influence. I am very grateful with your love, protection and support.
So how about you readers, how's your life with your Papa? How would you describe him? His influence and best traits?

If in case you'd a bad experience, not-so-nice episode with your father and you grow distant and cold towards him, maybe it's time to ponder on the significant role he portrayed in your life. 
Sometimes it is unavoidable to have occasional disagreements and arguments with fathers, children became disobedient, rebellious and ungrateful at times and wished they have a different Dad. 

How many stories have been told about a son that killed his father, a daughter that abandoned her father? Plenty and massive, and hearing these upsetting news made us to wonder if the world had really gone mad. But towards the end of the day, no matter how bad your relationship with your father, one truth remains unchanged, that there's only one Dad that could never be replaced.

So don’t ever think that your father had screwed up your life. He may have committed a grave mistake and did not live up to your expectations, remember, just like the rest of human beings, a father is not perfect. It's time to let go of those grudges. The old man deserved to be rewarded with gratitude, affection and respect. 

For this happy occasion honoring all fathers in the world,  let us pay tribute to the first man in our lives, whose attention and love made us to become more confident in life.

For first time fathers whose small kids still don't understand the meaning of the celebration, just relish the gift of fatherhood, nurture your young kids lovingly, someday when they become of age, they will appreciate your unconditional love and understand why they have to be disciplined and protected. 

To all fathers in the world, cheers!!! Happy Father's Day, Be Blessed!!

Looking for celebration ideas for your father, consider this suggestion from Travel Adventure

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Wonderful Weekend


Great days in a week!

Living in a densely populated environment with a fast-paced and mentally exhausting lifestyle is somewhat tormenting no wonder it often surprises me when I finish the day with an intact spirit and a cheerful heart. Ending a busy week with an inspiring disposition seems to be the most awesome blessing from God.

Believe me, if there's one thing I always wanted during my day in the workplace to maintain sanity amidst pressing my nose on urgent tasks, it's nothing but  a little talk. It's not that I like idleness or suffering from talk-to-me-or-else syndrome but I simply love talking, it always saves my day from boredom. A little conversation during the most crucial hours of a busy day picks my energy and helps prevent my system from thoroughly submerge to the bottom of annoyance and frustrations.

I prefer it than being constantly check and ask "are you okay?" Oh shockss! It's so irritating it's as if I am totally helpless and dumb. A short conversation is all I need :-P

Few months on and my mind finally settled, though I am seriously contemplating of exploring other career options especially in the field of writing and research, pondering on my potentials and mapping new life plans, I am thankful with what I have right now and felt extremely lucky. I also got a rare chance to work with the best people in the industry. Having a regular conversation with them enriches my professional growth and inspires my spirit to get on with life.

And speaking of  the best people....

...And just like the rest of normal Filipinos, we also posed for a 
photo souvenir after meal :-P
Thank you sir Rocky Turingan for this lunch treat :-D

Thank you Ms Lie Reyes for this handmade rubber bracelet something haha! 
Sorry I forgot the exact name lol! (update: the name is loomband haha!)

I had a good time with some of them, sharing laughter and hilarious conversation over lunch yesterday, Friday, June 6. It was a lunch treat from sir Rocky Turingan.

Sir Rocky and Ms Lie Reyes, are some of the managers I know who defy the concept of arduous executives in the corporate world. They are exceptionally kind and down-to-earth, who assume the role of a leader more than a manager, who never let anyone feel there's a gap of ranks, so amazing!

I remember  back in my Masteral days, we studied Leadership for Managers and Entrepreneurs that in order for someone to function effectively as a manager, he/she should first internalize the concept of a leader. A leader and a manager are two different worlds and it's so rare to find it both in a person. It takes wisdom and ability, commitment and compassion. Leadership is influencing and not managing, it's more on instructing and not by ordering. You will never let people feel they are constricted with the tasks given but you must let them feel there's a room for mistakes and improvement. Meeting sir Rocky, Ms.Lie and sir BJ, I understood it clearly.

Let's admit it, more than half of the world's population have this unbending belief that executives in highly reputable global companies are impossibly arrogant and painfully haughty who often made the lives of the subordinates emotionally agonizing but with the managers and associate managers I encountered in our project it's totally different. They are incredibly kind and nice and extraordinarily pleasant and generous, so lucky to meet them in my lifetime journey :-P

Okay, so last Friday, yeah it was terrific! Great, care-free conversation full of laughter and taunting over a sumptuous lunch at Dencios, a very relaxing moment and we got back to work with a loaded tummy hehe! Thank you sir Rocky and to the rest of the wonderful people: Ms Lie, Tori Donor, sir BJ Gorospe, Joyce Purisima, Ysa Leones and Joanne Lopez. Hope to spend another lunch date with you!

To sum it up---I had an oh-so-inspiring, incredible Friday!

You know, even how stressful your day is and how severely frustrating your routine, if you're with the best people and if you've this simple, quick but beautiful conversation with someone you feel  very comfortable with, it saves your day from disintegrating and will easily turn the sordid hours of irritation to gorgeous moments. Ayeee!

A short episode of a jesting chat always brings delight and I am glad I often get it from some people in the workplace. I owe it a lot to them and I am very grateful with their patience and attention.

Okay, so here's the cliche...I love someone who has a tremendous sense of humor and who talks leisurely with hilarity. My mood easily sets in and easiness starts to build...around afternoon had another quick talk...and it was nice ^_____^

I went downstairs at 7:35 in the evening and spent another hour at Venice Piazza. I went back to the lobby of the workplace at 8:45 (and a little miracle happened lol!!) in time for the departure of the company's shuttle back to Mandaluyong.

I finished the day with so much inspiration and happiness and contentment, felt like my heart was bursting with joy and delight and all those blissful thrills. I went home with a HUGE SMILE, BIG GRIN and my heart seemed dribbling again. Awww!

Indeed, a WONDERFUL WEEKEND!!!!

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Pandemonium



It’s crazy how my day would sometimes end up in pandemonium as if it was being consumed by whatever strong energy presents in the surrounding, which at times left me emotionally drain. 

It’s not that I am sad or troubled or struggling towards something but sometimes it feels like I am just dragging myself into a senseless state where there’s nothing I could do but to get on with all the compromises. Am I experiencing a quarter-life crisis?

It’s terribly upsetting because it feels like I am an automated machine merely following what’s being programmed, as if I am an obedient dog that wrestles to the ground when being commanded. I felt so useless. I'm stuck with stuff I don't feel like doing, so distressing to realize that I could never maximize my potentials and could not fit in.

Most often than not, I am in the middle of contemplation, pondering hard how to move forward and achieve what I always wanted.

Did I overestimate my goal? Or navigated the wrong path? I still did not hit my target. My dreams are still dangling somewhere and I am tired chasing with time.