Saturday, May 24, 2014

Life is a jungle


"At the touch of LOVE, everyone becomes a poet"
- PLATO


Everybody is looking for that elusive 'one true love’. Some found theirs at the early part of their lives, others (like me waaah!) looked like it would take forever to stumble on "the one". 

When I was still in my teens I dreamed that one day I could find that elusive "the one" among strangers and fall madly in love, spend the rest of our lives watching beautiful sunset, goes home sharing meal and laughter, patting back towards the end of a tiring day. But as time goes by, this dream seems slowly slipping and I am coming to terms with my destiny that maybe it would no longer come.

Watching my life rolled into different patterns of misfortune, longing and emptiness, and all those agonizing descriptions of endless waiting and failing to find my romantic match, I am thoroughly convinced now that I am really destined to live alone shockkks!!

In my life, I met people. Yes, lots of them and of different kinds. But only few times that I was able to feel "that perfect moment". You know that strange stuff when you feel like you are being transported to a different world, the terrific feeling where you can see the other side of the universe, wonderful, lovely, magnificent, awesome! It's an intuition, an instinct. And could never be forced, it will just come.

It rarely happens in my life. But when it comes, I know it's genuine. Sad to say, with all those rare times that it came, none of it came to reality.  Always at the wrong time.

Have you ever experience such thing that you seems too quite familiar with the person even if you just encounter or meet him/her for the first time? As if you feel extremely drawn? As if you are seeing incredible things at once?

But is it love? How would you really know it's finally true love? 

You know that magical, hard-to-explain thing when there's a little kick in the abdomen, when there seems to be tiny bubbles of excitement floating in the air, when your day, no matter how ugly it is, can be filled with beautiful colors.

There maybe some truth about the tale of Cinderella, it's love when the shoe fits perfectly. It's love when everything you feel is just right, so comfortable and good, when little things about that person that are so insignificant to others seem fascinating to you, when it gives you so much excitement through out the day that even a little action or by seeing the name gives you a unique brush of joy and thrill.

Well, literally, I am poisoned with the concept of fairytale...that someday prince charming will land in the backyard like a shooting star...

But life is a jungle with so many crossroads and too may stopovers, stories that are hard to tell along the way and by the time I reach the backyard...the prince is no longer charming.

And the little magic fizzles.

Why is it that every time I would feel that perfect moment suddenly an ugly truth always takes on the way? Am I cursed? Is my life a big joke?

I've never been into a relationship ever since so I've this excitement floating inside my heart that one day, I could able to meet that special person whoever he is. 

But well, sometimes life never spins the way we want it to be. Sometimes it leaves us no choice but to accept the quivering truth that not all we dreamed can be given.

Life can be so unfair at times.

When can I finally snag that beautiful "feel-the-moment" episode? Will it still come? Seems everyone is taken, everybody is no longer available.

For a moment, life temporarily loses its flavor and love becomes an eternal quest...

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