Saturday, November 30, 2013

Beautiful Weekend

I say it's beautiful because today, November 30, is a holiday and I can finally relax for two straight days.

I travelled with my sister yesterday from Manila for Caloocan via FX, and the travel took 3 hours and 30 minutes due to heavy traffic! Soooo tiring!!

Unfortunately, we're not able to visit Tagaytay as what I planned earlier this month. My sister has another itinerary today so I have no choice but to stay in the house with the cats, ngork!! To amuse myself and enjoy the weekend, I went out this morning to do some grocery and bought different kinds of fresh milk hahaha!

The three kinds of fresh milk I bought in the supermarket hehe! Oaties Milk (so creamy and refreshing), Anlene (yummy) and my all-time favorite Vitamilk (very healthy and satisfying) Cream roll mango flavor is another bread variety from Gardenia but honestly I don't like the taste hehe! I normally drink Pineapple juice in a week.

I want to get rid of stress so I decided to drink lots of fresh milk. I also bought fruits and carrots. for lunch. Every weekend I aim to eat healthy meals because during weekdays at work in Manila I eat nothing but unhealthy stuff  arghhhh!

I also bought and cooked foods for Kitties! Oh I love this responsibility, feeding and taking care of cats, it relaxes me and provides some brush of fulfillment. Thank God they are well and energetic, they played all day. I often buy them ascorbic acid to keep them healthy. 

Oh yes!!! Kitties are well and okay and they're back playing and having fun
around the house! Cotton's eyes are okay and Asi finally stopped sneezing
so happy to see them well again!

The eyes of Cotton are okay and Asi finally stopped sneezing, so nice to see them run around the house and sat in my lap.

Oh, and I love the weather right now in Caloocan, it's cloudy and cold! Christmas is in the air. The soft breeze in the morning is soothing and I love the slight rain shower hehe!


I spent the rest of the day watching DVD ^_____^

In a few hours, I'll be traveling back to Manila for work and I hate it, it's terribly agonizing, but on the other hand, I am happy to be blessed with this kind of job, felt lucky anyway.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Goin Home


How I love the thought of going home...

I've never been so sentimental of missing home, but now that I am living in Metro Manila the thought of going home is more attractive than marveling at the lively Christmas lights in the Metropolis. I felt the sudden yearning of being at home and experience its warmth and comfort especially this Christmas season.

Sometimes it's ridiculous to think that I am now appreciating the things I often neglected before. Life is ultra mysterious really, it makes us to turn 360 degrees in so many ways. Once I'd come across this inspiring quote "We appreciate things when they are done, we miss someone when they are gone, for it is always a mystery to realize the importance of something when it is already a memory". So true!

So now I'll just have to make it a point to enjoy my life here and be happy and count the good things over the bad ones to avoid being tensed. I make ways to breath at the beautiful scenery in my environment even if I am living in one of the busiest avenues in Metro Manila.

In the afternoon after work, I will walk around Taft Avenue infront of De La Salle University then cross to the other street and go window shopping at the Harrison Plaza near the Philippine Sports Commission and Rizal Football Stadium. It somehow eases the hollowness I felt deep inside. At night time I would join my colleagues in the living room of the apartment (where we lived) talking and sharing amusing things then retired to bed before 10:00 pm...

It's good to be home...even just in my thoughts ^______^

What's happening in the present depends on how we view life: "You can either be a victim of the world or an adventurer in search of a treasure"So I choose to be an adventurer, it's more relieving than the idea of being a victim of the world. I would consider every mishap I encountered as part of the challenge of searching that treasure :-)


Sunday, November 24, 2013

Last Week of November

I've been feeling a bit anxious these past few days, so many thoughts about life jumbled in my mind, so much so that I need to recharge and loosen up somewhere else to unload these burdens. Hopefully the coming week will provide me some peace of mind.

You know that feeling when you're very confuse, very restless and don't know exactly where that sort of "anxiety" came from? Questions have been knocking my mind "Do I go this way?Will I choose this, will I discard that, who to talk to, where I am heading, what tomorrow brings?" Goshhhh!So many confusing thoughts and questions fidgeted inside my tired brain.

The following week will be the last week of November 2013. Hopefully I can get a little peace of mind in the workplace. I want to get through with this month, I am more excited with December, so many great anticipation to look forward to, the Christmas lights, the Christmas holiday rush, the Christmas eve with lots of food, the Early Dawn mass and the overall Christmas feel of joy and happiness, oh I love it! Though I am deeply saddened that I cannot return home to Surigao this holiday season, I am happy to know that my parents and my brothers are well and okay, hope God continue to protect them and provide them with good health and comfort.

So what's up for the coming week?

Restless with so many things, I want some breather and a peaceful environment. Hope to find time to visit Tagaytay, I cannot wait to go to Sky Ranch where Sky Eye, touted as the highest Ferris wheel in the Philippines, is located.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Memories of my Macau Travel

While watching, via GMA7, the fight between Manny Pacquiao and Brandon Rios held at the Cotai Arena in The Venetian Casino Resort in Macau, I could not help but reminisced my wonderful time visiting this beautiful Chinese region last June 2013.

At The Venetian Casino Resort, Cotai Strip, Macau
Don't be deceived with the blue sky you see in the picture, it's only a design of the ceiling
At the Senado Square, one of the most visited landmarks in Macau.
The European influence of this area is still very much alive. Macau is formerly a Portuguese colony, it was turned over to China in 1999 making it the last European stronghold in Asia. Hongkong, a British colony, returned to Chinese rule in 1997.

The memories are still fresh because of so many unforgettable moments I had with this place, it was in this place that I lost my eyeglass hehe! But I would still want to go back there if I had enough budget, I haven't explore other landmarks like Wynn and MGM. The Venetian is spectacularly great, very European ambiance, the structure, the design, while Galaxy mall is soooo elegant and sweet-scented!

I'm so happy that Manny Pacquaio won, of course he is my fellow Mindanaoan, having him seen won the fight after two successive defeats is such a beautiful feeling, so proud of him. His win is a great relief to all of us Filipinos after part of the country was badly devastated by super typhoon Haiyan (named Yolanda in the Philippines) last November 8.

After watching the fight on TV, I crawled to bed to get some nap, I felt so lazy packing my things and travel back to Manila for work :-(

My Weekend Diary

I'm super excited now because tomorrow, November 24, 2013, will be the last Sunday of ordinary times in the Catholic Calendar, and next Sunday, December 1, 2013, is the start of the Advent season meaning Christmas is in the Air!!

But in the Catholic faith, it is still not Christmas season because Advent is different from Christmas. Advent means "preparation for the coming of Christ" while Christmas season celebrates the birth of Christ.

Christmas, which starts on December 25 and ends on Sunday of the Epiphany (second Sunday of January) is simply my happiest season of the year and no matter what happens in my day,  the thought of Christmas always inspires me and makes me giddy. But the saddest part is, I cannot go home to Surigao to be with my parents because I am here in Manila. 

My weekend routine includes going home to Caloocan from Manila comes Saturday afternoon. Then back to Manila on Sunday afternoon for work. I hate traveling on Monday morning because of the rush hour, heaving to the thick crowd for an LRT ride is so stressful.

A while ago, when I went home, I decided to ride an FX for SM Fairview instead of LRT because I intended to go to SSS Robinson-Nova (just in front of SM Fairview) but sad to say it was intensely raining and it was so difficult to cross the road under heavy downpour with so many bags in my two hands (I usually bring my "labada" to Caloocan on weekend hehe!)

So I went directly to jeepney terminal, just beside SM Fairview, and caught a ride for Camarin, Caloocan. I passed by at Puregold Zabarte to make some grocery, I also bought special food for Kitties!hehehe

It's always relieving to be at Caloocan on weekend playing with Kitties and experiencing stillness away from the neurotic scene in the office where I have a temperamental boss, grrrrr!

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Rush Hour

It pisses me off at times. But as weeks gone by, I've learned to embrace it...

At the start of the busy week, my nerves and pulses rise again heaving through the thick crowd across Blumentritt to catch an LRT ride. 

Pushing myself to the throng of people, walking fast and catching my breath are the normal routine of my system at the beginning of the week, it makes my heart pounds so fast that I thought it would burst into flame if I won't take some moment to pause and rest. Rush Hour is really severe in the Metropolis even if it's still early in the morning.

Before, I frequently heard the words (and even watched two movies with the same title) but got no idea really how it felt to be stuck in Rush Hour until I worked in Metro Manila, darn!! It's so intensely suffocating, felt like the veins in my head will explode due to pressure and strain.

The travel sometimes takes 2 and a half hours depending on the dense of traffic. It's so stressful but I have to endure it because it's part of the consequences I have to take for deciding to come to Manila.

More weeks passed, I felt I had push myself too far beyond my limit until weariness took over my system and began asking myself if this is the kind of life I really wanted, the fast-paced lifestyle is simply tedious. But I have no regrets, at least I've come to experience all these things otherwise I will be left thinking what if I tried, what if I did this and that, at least I see the other side of the coin, the comfort and relaxed environment I was enjoying in Davao City.

Now I can find balance in my life and can weigh everything where I should be heading and what are the things that really matter to me. Now, I have so many stories to tell about my life ^______^

Saturday, November 16, 2013

That sort of thing called emptiness...


The trouble with life is, when you already figured out what you want and determined to get it that's when tiny pieces of emptiness started bursting, which made you feel like a total failure. Did I overestimated my plans and decisions and too confident with my journey?

When I decided to come to Manila some months back, I thought there's no turning back, I thought that's all what  wanted. I was so preoccupied with the rosy thought of living in a bustling city where energy and fun never sleep, where dreamed job can be easily achieved, I was so busy thinking how I would spend each day strolling around the lively street and elegant landmarks, how I would spring to life and put color on it, how I would recapture the wasted moment of joy I did not truly experience in Davao. Excitement after excitement, fun after fun, leisure after leisure, until I got my first job and see the opposite side of it, reality started to sink in.

The happiness I felt was very temporary, until I realized, the game plan I created was nothing but a fallacy. It was so unrealistic and it dawned in my mind that not all vibrant things other people appreciated are suited to everyone. The satisfaction I felt was just an illusion, a mask to the pretension I created within myself.

But it' just so meaningless to start regretting the things I've decided upon, it's just not right to blame either or to spend every minute of the day cursing my destiny. I'm simply tired of it and just want to focus identifying things that can make me truly happy and maybe start rediscovering myself and figure out where I am heading before emptiness ruin myself.

Sometimes it's ridiculous to think that at one point in our journey, we created permanent decisions for wrong and temporary reasons. Sometimes we misunderstood the things in our environment then hastily jumped on wrong conclusions.

Oh God! Why I felt so empty and so lonely? How can I stop this? I regularly pray of course, but at this point in time, I am unsure what God wants me to do and what lessons He wanted me to learn and where He wanted me to start living a meaningful life, I need enough time to discern my fate thoroughly.

On the other side, I felt so lucky because despite the escalating unemployment in the Philippines, I am so fortunate that I have a job and enjoying a decent salary, in fact I am very blessed because I worked in a prestigious establishment with very good benefits for employees, something I've been looking in an employment, but why I am still not fulfilled? Why I felt so deprived with life and still looking for something else? Felt like I am lost in the forest and needed a compass to locate again the road I would suppose to travel.

Why I felt like a total mess?

Maybe because some of my decisions were created for wrong reasons. I wanted to run away, from pain, from hurt, from everyone and everything else who knew me and wanted to start a new life in a place where nobody knows me and live happily ever after, abracadabra!

Now I realized, that part of fairytale is very tragic, a complete disaster because in reality, no one can really live perfectly-happily-ever-after, no one can really find that wonderland, there's no such thing as perfect existence, perfect decision.

Tired and weary how to ease the emptiness I felt, I tried texting a long time friend hoping to find serenity and peace of mind. He responded fortunately. So I started pouring in all the anxieties I felt, he sent me positive messages. His  words helped lessen the emotional burden I carried.

But through out trying times, I never cease praying and asking God's assistance, the emptiness and disappointments I felt only strengthened my faith in Him. I know I can still see a beautiful light of hope in my life in the days to come.

Oh God grant me the serenity and peace of mind and help ease the emotional burden I am carrying now, there's no one to turn to expect in your consoling embrace.

I found solace from this very meaningful verse in the Holy Bible:

 "Everything that happens in this world happens at the time God chooses". (Ecclesiastes 3:1-11)