Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Life Must Go On

I squirmed hardly on my bed and surprised to see the clock ticking already past 9:00 in the morning. My head seemed ready to burst with intense pain that I got up swaying on my feet.

I could scarcely recognize the  yellow airmail I put in my table to ponder on the contract sent by Dorrance Publishing, I planned to make a review on it but my mind seemed not cooperating. I hardly sleep last night with so much thoughts and anxieties tousled my troubled brain. What is it again?

Barely two years, I found myself trailed again in the same route, this time, I am afraid everything will never turn out good. I am bitterly hurled on the wrong side of the road already and buried me as unrepentant fool. I tried to placate, sort of humility, but it seems everything had been shut down. My tired mind seemed run out of possible actions that could pacify a boiling spirit and all I could do now is to concede defeat.

I felt bad about myself, about everything. I am shrouded with too much clutters again. Well, summer is about to end, rainy season will be haunting the Philippine soil soon, what will I do now? Go with the rain again? A year ago, I thought the line of the song "After the rain, the sun comes" is as real as blooming flowers, but it abruptly fade even before I recognized there's really enough sunshine that makes the leaves shimmer like silver thread.

But I easily learned lessons. I am emotionally stronger now than in the past. I never mope too much unlike before. I also stop thinking that I am a great failure, I know I am not. I have a huge, bright future ahead. I love my life and won't waste it by spending each day in remorse and regret.

Life must go on...

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